Modesty—Glorifies God, Part 2

Another question that I posed at the beginning of the series was:

Do I even have a right to address this topic to other Christians?  Let’s not judge, right?

Well, besides the fact that God cares and gives me the authority to talk about such a topic, what I want to go into deeper today is how we approach a fellow Christian when they are not acting or dressing modestly.

But before I go on, I want to mention my husband’s blog, Mature Manhood of Christ.  Right now he is writing a series on Judgment.  Please check that out as well, as it goes into if and how we are to judge and explores this topic much more than I will do today.

Now…  I want to go back to the verse I mentioned yesterday:

And he said, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.”  (Mark 7:20-23)

What people are trying to do is rebuke a fellow Christian that they believe is guilty of a few of the above sins listed in the verse—sexual immorality, sensuality, pride, or just pure foolishness.  And while I believe that we are to rebuke other Christians of sins, most people fail miserably when it comes to modesty.

They leave messages on Facebook pages or blogs.  They just off-handedly make a comment about the way the person is dressed, usually a little mean-spirited.  Or they condemn a certain type of clothing because it’s not modest.  And then they leave it at that.

Is that what we are called to do?

Of course not!  If we felt called to address someone on this topic, we are called to go to the person in private first and foremost (Matthew 18:15).  You don’t do that on public Facebook pages.  And if we are to talk to a person in private, there is a way to go about it.

For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit…  If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.  Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it.  (1 Corinthians 12:12-13, 26-27, emphasis added)

The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life. To the King of the ages, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen.  (1 Timothy 1:15-17, emphasis added)

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.  (Galatians 6:1, emphasis added)

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  (Ephesians 4:29-32, emphasis added)

Christ first displayed patience for us and we were baptized into one body when we accepted Jesus as our savior.  When we talk with others we are to do so in a gentle way and builds up the body for Christ.  We do not tear it down, because we are one body.

The way that we approach someone is a way that portrays Jesus to them.  You are being a visual and verbal picture of Jesus to another person.  That should be foremost in your mind.  Remember, Jesus confronted people and he did not tolerate sin.  So yes, you should confront this issue.  But we are to be “tenderhearted”: sympathetic, compassionate, soft.  I’m reminded of a song lyric right now; “break my heart for what breaks yours.”

Would you walk into a random funeral and say, “Guess he got what he deserved” and then walk out?  No, or if you did, everyone there would just think you were a jerk.

In the same way, don’t say “that shirt is not modest.  What were you thinking?” and then just leave.  What good does that do?  How does that even begin to get to the heart of the matter?  The only thing you are doing is tearing down.  And on those same lines, don’t just assume you know what the true matter of the heart is.

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”  (1 Samuel 16:7)

More than likely if we had to guess what is the heart of the matter based on outward appearance, we would be wrong.  I don’t have one way to approach a person when confronting the issue of modesty, because every situation is different.  Every heart issue is different.  But I can say that you must do so in order to build up the person in Christ, do so with a tender heart, and do so in private.  Skip any of those and you might as well keep your mouth shut, because you just “grieve the Holy Spirit of God.”

Join me next week for Modest is Self-Control.

through His grace alone!

Sarah